Thanks for your sharing. It can’t have been easy to pen all these thoughts down, but I commend and salute your bravery and honesty. The journey or life and love is a long and convoluted one (I am in a similar journey now) and each of us has our own story and though there may be similarities, none of us shares the exact same journey or road.
My prayer is that you will find your way and you and your husband will forge a new and better path through this experience. And that there will some day be a new post that tells of new desire, new intimacy and new hope - forever.
Take care and thanks again.