Alan, thanks for this sharing. I am glad that you managed to meet up with your mother and have that love for her, warts and all. As you wrote:

“ You made her happy…you examined and explored and were brave in the face of emotional fear, for yourself and for her, you sang a salve into her coral bones, and it matters not if anyone can see this, the winds of time have come to change you, to make good again on the relationships that are important and bloodline, to resynchronize your circadian rhythms, for you are capable of love and forgiveness in many forms,…”

Takes a strong man, and a true man to say those words. Men like that are hard to find, and it is good to be one of them. Hope to read more from you in the days to come, Alan!